Practical Living for a Solo Soul - Advantages and Disadvantages living Alone

FINALLY! oh yeah Chen, so much for a series eh? haha...
Well, things happened! A lot than I expected, so... I managed to conclude this series A MONTH after I promised. Yea Right!

Anyhow, here I am... will blabber a little bit about what I think that are disadvantages and advantages of living alone. I have actually tipped a little bit about this on my December series 2015 - Changes in Me after 7 years living alone, but for this post, I will go for a little detail about what's good and what's not so good about living alone.

Again, this is a very subjective post for it is based on my humble observation and experiences.

ADVANTAGES:
1. Independent!
There's no doubt about this. Meaning, you can decide things finely without being too dependant on other people. I have seen how different me or other 'perantau' with people who grow up entirely with their family. Not saying that they are fully not independent, but yeah.. there's slightly difference. For example, I know how to pay tax, how to change the LPG when it is empty, how to change the dispenser, how to change light bulb, and how to clean my own bath room. Simple things, but it does matter.

2. Independence!
I am differentiate this with point number one, because this is more about decisions. I decide my own things, and my parents let me decide it. Not all of course, but little things like where to travel, what to buy, what to eat, I decide them on my own. I don't have to wait for other people, and just go!

3. Creative!
Oh yeah... somehow, you are more creative because there's some limitations, and you have solve your own problems. No vehicles for grocery shopping? Walk and bring back pack, limit it for your own needs, and done! not so much fuss about it :) Especially, you get creative when managing money for the entire month lol.

4. Maturity...
It is not entirely true, but I feel it more. Again, comparing my self with others.. or comparing my friends who live abroad or away from their parents, they have moved one step forward in order of maturity. Perhaps because you face problems on your own, small or big. Friends and Families are still on reach, but for the immediate action, you are the one who will handle it eventually.

5. A lot of Me Time
Plenty of them actually. This is an advantage, because you have time to process things in your head beforehand. Your head becomes busy, and you can catch on details or things that other people are not aware of.

DISADVANTAGES
1. Lonely...
this is an ultimate price that you have to pay. Well, friends do help, but when you are at your rented place, you are going to realize that there's only one brush teeth at the bathroom, there's only one towel hung, there's only one bed, there's only you. Yes, I do still feel lonely at home alone. I love being with my family when I am home in Makassar for Christmas. Dogs barking, my niece is crying, my father is watching on his pad, my mom is watching tv, Here in Malang, I go to church by my self, I eat while I am watching TV since it is the only source of voice that I can think of. Not so bad, but it is definitely the down part of living alone.

2. Individualistic...
Somehow, it grows deeper in you that you can't really stand when you are around with many people for a longer period of time. You are longing your loneliness. hahaha what a contrary, but it is the fact. You have no problem to go alone and sometimes will not follow the majority.

3. Everything needs to be done by YOU
From laundry, paying bills, and other small stuff. Even when you are sick, you need to boil water, cook yourself a bowl of porridge. It is not fun at all, but manageable. *sigh

4. Everything needs to be decided by YOU
Sometimes, it is great to have such an independence for deciding what you wanna do, what you wanna eat, but it all eventually depends on your mood. It is nice to have heard some ideas from other person as well.

In the end, it is all about you against the world huh? Not so bad actually. But, yes... you have to remind yourself that you are human who needs some social interaction, more than just meet up, but a person who is just be there for you.
I enjoy my solo living so far, but I did feel loneliness, and I knew that I am growing to be more individualistic. The things is, you just need to balance out yourself. I believe each matter has the bad and the good...

Good luck!! :)

CVB

Currently - October Mood

Let the intermezzo is in!
A halt for previous series. I need to release my October mood. I have been haunted by this idea that I am doubting my own heart. It is like... I know the answer is there, but my mind is still speculating this and that. It is confusing and exhausting. It reminds me a lot of those days back in 2011 when I struggled on whether to go home or to stay in the States. Here, all over again with different matters, with more uncertainty. Growing up, things are not getting easier haha... Here it is an excerpt from an Indonesian movie in early 2000, starred Rachel Maryam and Marcel Siahaan - Andai Ia Tahu. 

Kejujuran itu seperti es krim
Kalau tidak dilahap... bakalan cepat meleleh.. 
hilang ditelan hawa panas. 
Bisep di tangan itu kan otot fisik. Nah.. kejujuran itu otot mental. 
Dan otot harus dilatih terus.. biar kuat...

Hari ini latihan kejujuran gue... 
Jujur pada diri sendiri...

Gue takut... 
Takut kalau intuisi gue mengenai banyak hal selama ini salah... 
Gue takut... 
Takut kalau gue bangun besok matahari nggak muncul di timur...
Atau gimana ketika gue bangun besok...
Gue baru tahu..

Kalau hati bisa salah...

Renata - Andai Ia Tahu, 2002

Honesty is like an ice cream. If it is not eaten, it will be gone out of the heat. Biceps in our hands are muscles, honesty is mental's muscles. And muscles are supposed to be trained.
My honesty train for today is.. honest to my self.

I am scarred...
Scarred if my intuition about many things are wrong.
I am scarred...
Scarred if I wake up tomorrow, the sun is not showing from East.
Or how about if I am waking up tomorrow, I just know that... heart can be wrong...

It is representing what I have been feeling. Following heart. Intuition. All is my thing, but... I am in that position where my head speaks louder stirring my heart. I have fears. Nonetheless, I also encountered one good quote early this month...

Are you feeling a bit shaken, maybe stirred, and maybe fearful, and completely, utterly, wildly terrified? 

Good! Keep Going!

Victoria Erickson

So... Chen... Clench you teeth hard and keep going!!!  

CVB